Secrets

Authors Note: This is a story I wrote. I tried to correctly write in my dialogue for when the people in my story have conversations. 

     Everybody has secrets. Some secrets are small, and along the lines of who you have a crush on, or whose outfit you secretly hated. These secrets have little impact on our lives, and blow over within the next couple days. Then there are big secrets. These secrets have a much bigger impact on our lives. About a month ago, I came across a secret about my dad that definitely classifies as a big secret. He had been cheating on my mom. I never thought he would do something like that, but after throwing up at soccer practice I had walked home and witnessed my dad, and whoever the lady was, kiss goodbye. It wasn't your typical goodbye kiss though; it was held out too long and was very sloppy. My dad and I made eye contact but I was already half way across my yard before he could get the words "Sidney wait!" out of his mouth. I kept running and running until I reached a busy intersection and decided it was time to stop. My mind was racing with many different questions. What had just happened? Did I see what I thought I saw? Who was that lady? Does my dad love my mom? Does my dad love me? I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice my dad pull up in his car. "Get in, Sidney." he said. I stood there frozen, not knowing what to do, but finally, without answering, I opened the door and got in the car. The second I sat down, I could feel the awkward tension between us. My dad was the first to speak. "Look, about what you saw earlier...” Not wanting to have this conversation with him, I cut him off”I didn't see anything, Dad." 

"Sidney, I know what you saw...and I just want you to know that I love you and your mother and what you saw today was the ending to the biggest mistake I have ever made." He looked sincere enough, or was that just what I wanted to see?

"Who is she?" I asked.

“That doesn't matter, all that matters is that you keep this between us, okay? Your mother doesn't need to know." I didn't know what to say. I thought of my mother, she was nice and innocent and definitely had a right know. 

"Sidney you have to promise not to tell your mother okay? Today was the last time I am ever going to see that other woman I swear!" 

I was torn in half. On one side, I knew that everyone makes mistakes, and I didn't want to have to go through a divorce. On the other, I thought of my mom, she should know that her husband had been cheating on her, and maybe she would give him a chance to redeem himself. Finally, after a moment of silence, I replied "Okay I promise I won't tell, but you need to promise me to never see that girl again?" 

"Of course, or course, thank you Sidney, you're doing the right thing." 

His last sentence sent chills up my spine because I knew deep down that I wasn't doing the right thing. Weeks passed and everything seemed to go well, my parents were getting along wonderfully and I had been asked to play up for the older grades soccer team. Everything was almost perfect, except for the guilt. The guilt was like a monster that was inside of me, biting and thrashing, trying to get out. I also realized that I couldn't look my mom in the eyes anymore, for fear I would slip and say something. My life went on like this for what seemed like ages. Then finally one day, I got home early form soccer, and I saw THE woman again. My heart dropped. She was THE woman who my dad was "never going to see again." The tears came almost instantly, and as I retreated, this time without being seen, I ran until I hit the intersection again. Now instead of tears just falling, I was full out sobbing. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted my mom’s car. She pulled over and instantly was shaking me and yelling

"Sidney what's wrong? Sidney talk to me!" 

"Please don't hate me!" I yelled. 

"Sidney I don't hate you, what's wrong?" 

I could barely make out the words but I looked her in the eyes and told her the secret. "Dad has been cheating on you. I don't know how long it's been going on for, over a month for sure. I caught them together after soccer one day and I didn't know what I should do! Dad said not to tell you but I wanted to, I really did Mom! Please don't hate me!" As soon as I finished, it felt like a gazillion pounds had been lifted off my shoulders. I took a deep breath, and looked up at her. She just stared. Minutes passed. It seemed like a millennium had gone by before she broke the silence.

"Sidney get in the car we're going home."

"W-w-what?"

"Sidney get in the car. Now."

I stood up and made my way to the car. No one said anything on the ride home. When we pulled in the driveway, my mom goes “Sidney get out of the car."

"Mom where are you going?"

"Sidney get out of the car!" she was yelling now.

I leapt out of the car and stood in the driveway as she pulled away. She took off, going way above the speed limit. She made an unusual looking turn that lead her to our backyard. I was too in shock to realize what was happening, and even after she crashed into the shed and started her car on fire, it took me a second to react. I sprinted towards her, even though I knew she was already dead. I was screaming "Mom! Wake up, I'm sorry!" over and over again, I didn't even stop as the paramedics moved me out of the way. It was there as I watched them remove my mother's dead body, that I realized it was my fault she was dead. I shouldn't have told her. This secret, this big secret was too much for her to handle. Now, my life had changed forever and things would never be the same.